Part Five

Just a quick point.....after observing my dad I have noticed, and indeed I think this applies to all blokes (including yours truly), one of the struggles in a males life is the little tie wraps that help keep a bread loaf in the packaging. You know the one?!?! there usually yellow and can be found on all bread loaves! I watched my dad for a good few minutes declaring war on this tricky piece of kit, until a great level headed women in his life (my dearest mother) came in a sorted out a piece treaty between my dad and the tie wrap.


I have some bloody good news reports to give you people. Scouring the worlds media I have found these...........

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-13694382
(Nice idea!!)

http://edition.cnn.com/2011/WORLD/asiapcf/06/12/world.shortest.man/index.html?hpt=hp_t2
(when you read this one, take a look at the person being measured, isn't it a baby?)

http://rt.com/usa/news/alex-jones-drones-global-skynet/
(In a way this would rather cool to see. Obviously the nuclear explosion wouldn't good or the mass killings by the T100's)

Part Four

I needed to show you these people.....its a selection of brilliant photographs that represent time

Not bad right?

Part Three

Well its been a while since my last one!! I have been bouncing around ides of what to write for the third instalment, of lets face it, the ramblings of some bloke bored out of his mind in a very small yet very shite village in the centre of Lincolnshire.  

Before I continue.... I need you all to know how much I loved the new X-Men film (cleverly entitled X- men First Class, this is because its a prequel to the first three films you novices). It had everything, the comedy, the action, the struggle of the characters. You do defiantly get you moneys worth in this film, I would think about going people even if you don't like the genre of film.  

Any way there's my rotten tomato style review, I feel its as good as the people who do the reviews. Who I think have no idea what the hell their talking about, because I love most of the films that they discredit. Seriously how on earth do they come up with their percentages. It cant come from geeks sat in  room working stuff out  'based on probability and numbers'.

I reckon they have a dart board style piece of kit with the numbers from 1 - 100 (for the %'s) and where ever the dart lands then this is rating for the review. Its utter crap Rotten Tomatoes and such film critics as you. YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING more then the average humanoid cinema dwelling creature.. so stop giving it the large ones and let people make there own mind up. 

I babble on.....

Yesterday (04-06-11) I had one of the most surreal moments in my life to date. Picture this people....Im sat at a mates house drinking, what is considered some of the best moonshine cider in all of two villages, when we hear a scream outside....

Before I go on I must reveal that my mate lives on a farm in the middle of nowhere (away from the shite small village I live in, what a lucky bastard)

....We both launch up out of our very comfy throw back chairs and run outside, ( I must admit I was panicking slightly) to see my mates sister coming round the corner with a stick in her hand shouting bloody loud. She went on to inform us that a crafty little shit of a fox had got one of the chickens and wouldn't let go. At this point (this is were, I think the story kind of steps up into the surreal) my mate runs into his house only to appear again with what looks like a rather large shotgun, (at this point I thought all hell was going to break loose, some proper WW3 shit was going to go down) we started running in the direction to which the fox had scampered off in. 

So can you picture it? two guys, one with a bottle of moonshine cider the other with shotgun traipsing after a fox through a  field. I honest to god thought I was in a cheap dirty south film for a few minutes, you know the ones, they normally have bare footed guys shooting boom sticks at each other in there cool looking dungarees. 

I mean come on when does any one ever have a Saturday night like this, it defiantly beats going to the local flea pit (by that I mean town) and getting your head bottled for saying 'excuse me' now doesn't it.......

There you go I dare you to come up with  more surreal anecdote.

Stay tuned................